Time Bakes
by BurgerLover
Summary: Michael, Trevor, and Franklin uncover the terrible truth about their creation!
1. Prefrontal

Time Bakes

Prefrontal

"...and lemme' tell ya sumthin' kid... You live, you lie, you learn." Michael churned. He was giving his new crime apprentice Franklin a lecture on the story of my life. "Chit dawg, that garbage is copyright!" And and that moment the state police swarmed in and shot the suit Michael was wearing until it was bullet holed and Michael passed out. Franklin was not shot because he was black and it would be a hate crime. "Woah dawg!" Franklin put his hands up, clearly surrendering. One of the black swat team officers was about to handcuff franklin when a white police officer took out his club and began mercilessly beating the shit out of Franklin. Panting, the officer nodded to the swat team guy who was previously about to handcuff franklin. "Sorry, I can't contain my inner rage. My pop owned a plantation in the 70's. The whole squad laughed as they hauled Michael and the beaten up negro.


	2. Chapter 1

Chapped 1

Michael was slowly coming to. "Huh? Where-" he saw Franklin sitting on a bench. "Hey F. What happened?" Michael questioned. Franklin glared at Michael. "Man, I told yo stupid ass this was gon' happen if you say the copyright chit!" Michael took closer look at his surroundings. They were in a prison cell! "Man, it's all yo fault!" Franklin started up again, but was interrupted by the cell door opening. Both of them looked up at the image to see Niall and Harry from One Direction! They were SOOO cute! And Niall's ass was perfect, Harry's face was peachy- not in a gay, but heterosexually gay way. OMG, they were sooooo hawt. And Michael just couldn't keep it in... AN: Oh wait that was me... Bet anyway back to story. But soon their cute smiles turned to dark frowns. "So. Which one of you biggot's thought it was okay to mention "The Story of My Life" by us?" Niall began. "I don't know what you're taking about." Spat Michael. Niall gestured to Harry. "Give it to em. Hard." Harry pulled a pipe from his jacket and splashed the toilet water that was stored in the pipe over Michael. AN: What Did you think he was going to hit em'? We Brits are above you American violent scum! "AHHHHH!" Michael screamed in horror, drenched in his own feces. And other bubba urine.' And just when Michael was about to drown, a mere rival miracle happened. 


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Electric Boogaloo

"AW CHIT NIGGA DAT'S NASTY!" Coughed Franklin. Michael passed out on the ground. Franklin readied his fists. "C'mon niggas I can take yo scrawny white asses." Franklin beckoned. "Tisk tisk." Niall waggled his finger. "Naughty naughty." Said Harry, also waggling his finger in a disciplining way. "You can't touch us, we are celebrities, and you are behind bars." Giggled Niall. AN: GAWD Niall is so CUTE when he giggles...anyway. "If you hit us, you'll be in jail for life." Chuckled Harry. AN: MMM HARRY CHUCKLING GURGLRL. "Man, ya'll niggas need to get da fuck out befo I whip yo asses.." Said Franklin annoyed. "Go ahead, try." Smirked Niall. Franklin was about to smash in Niall's face but then he noticed the security guards giving him dirty looks. Franklin backed away with a pouty face. "Ahahaha." Laughed Niall and Harry together. "Lil' wanka di'nt have it in 'em." Harry laughed, pouring the remaining pipe juices in Franklin's face. Suddenly BAAAM a ghetto red truck blasted through the prison walls. The prison sirens went off. A wasted redneck came out of the truck. "Whut the bloody L?" Harry and Niall questioned aloud. The man walked right up to Niall and Harry. "Oh Harry, looky, it's one of them Redneck Canadians I always heard about! I want a selfie with it!" Niall pranced next to Trevor and took out his iPhone. "What the fuck did you just call me?" Asked Trevor. "Pish posh you silly redneck, smile for the Directioners!" Giddied Niall. Trevor's sight began to redden. He took Niall's iPhone and THREW IT ON THE GROUND! Niall scoffed Brittly at Trevor's nasty stench and attitude. "My word, you Americunts are quite rude!" Harry patronized. Trevor took out an AK-47 and mowed Niall down. His blood splattered everywhere. Harry's mouth gaped open in awe. Franklin cheered, "go you crazy muthafucka!" Trevor then grabbed Harry's hair and repeated smashed his head on the jail bars. Harry cried in a proper, British fashion. Trevor took Harry's iPhone and took a selfie with his beaten up state. "SMILE FOR THE DIRECTIONERS YOU LITTLE FAGGOT!" Trevor whispered in Harry's ear. Harry whimpered sexily. Trevor then threw Harry on the ground and took a piss on him. "Ah yea, you like that you little fuck?!" Trevor loled at Harry. He then took out a pair of electric wires and electrocuted Harry's nipples to death. "That's what you god damn Brits get for calling me a Canadian you crumpet fucking bastards!" Exclaimed Trevor. "I LOVE YOU NIGGA!" Franklin cheered. "Now come on, let's get lost before the cops come." Trevor pulled out a chainsaw from his ass and destroyed the bars. Franklin and Trevor picked up Michael and blasted through the facility in Trevor's truck. "Thanks dawg." Said Franklin. "You all owe me." Said Trevor. "Of course my nigga, anything." Replied Franklin. "Well...I kind of...need that favor now." Trevor looked in his rear view mirror and noticed a car tailing them.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Beevus and Baggard

Franklin got up from the seat and slowly tried to make his way to the back of the truck bed. He was going to jump onto the car chasing them. It was a high speed chase, much danger. No cops though because no one was shooting-yet. But then Trevor slammed on the brakes and then accelerated really fast so Franklin flung onto the car chasing Trevor in front of the wind shield. "UG!" Franklin pained. Trevor performed a sharp right turn into the country side now that the tailgaters were distracted by a nigga on a window. Because the car was driving so fast and swerving trying to get Franklin off, he could not move. They used the windshield wipers but then the wipers turned into Mickey and money mouse and they brushed his teeth using $$$'s. Franklin screamed and moaned "AHHHHH NIGHA GET TAT BENJAMIN MUTHA FUKIN FRANKLN OFF MY MOUTH!" But Mickey and money did not care. "Aha, that's whatcha get for bein a Niger!" Money mouse did not speak because she was a money. Finally the car flew off the edge of the Grand Canyon. Franklin flew off the car. "AHHHHH!" He screamed but then a parachute spawned and he safely glided and hit the ground- right onto train tracks! He was hit by the train and blasted at least 50 meters. He got up in two seconds and shook it off. "Damn, that hurt!" He now looked up at the sky, unknown wherest Michael and Trevor were. The camera pap, pap, boomed! Into the sky and switched to Trevor's point of view. It zoomed in. Trevor was licking Michael's right nips. He then kicked his foot into his ass, and licked his face next. Michael finally woke up after a third pass of lick-kickin' sex. "WOAH WAT THE!" Michael panicked looking for his Trevor said to Michael "I want ur babies." And Michael pouted but eventually they fucked. They fucked so hard. But then someone was knocking on the window- WHO COULD IT BE?! 


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Money Galore

"Guys, this is no time to for bromance." Said Lester while knocking on the window. "FUCK OFF YOU DONUT!" Yelled Trevor while opening the window and shoving a grenade in Lester's mouth. Lester pulled it out of his mouth. "Guys, I have a new heist for you, but you all have to choose what option you want...where's Franklin?" Lester asked. "Uh..." Michael and Trevor looked stupidly at each other. Suddenly Franklin came out of nowhere, with thousands of bullet holes and blood all over his face. "Niggas, dat ain't cool mah homies. My nigga ass woulda been raped by these mothafuckas' frum dat illuminati organization of Bizney if it wasn't for mah Special Skill of driving." Franklin explained. "Nobody understands you, Franklin." Snorted Lester in a nerdy way. Franklin punched Lester in the face. "Franklin, we were about to be prepped for a heist!" Michael whined. Trevor looked at Michael. "Shut the fuck up you fat shit." Trevor slapped Michael. Michael made a pouty face but did nothing. Franklin hauled Lester's ass into Trevor's truck with his black nigga strength. They all drove to Lester's house and waited for Lester to wake up. In the meantime, Franklin was punished and had to knit a quilt out of beer because it was the only morally right thing to do after knocking a disabled person out cold. Trevor stripped naked and walked around the house wasted, but it was ok because that's what Trevors do. Finally, Lester woke up. "So..?" Michael asked. Lester got up and showed the three of them a bulletin board. "So uh...you're gonna have these two choices for heist." Lester pointed to a smiley face and an upset face. "Smiley face." Said Franklin. "Great, that means you'll have to get me 5 customized cars, 2 police vans, 1 nuclear weapon, 3 jackhammers, 8 uniforms, and pick 6 people who you will give up half your money for, even though they will most likely do a shit job and die." Michael nodded his head even though he was texting, Franklin was a confused nigga, and Trevor was peeing in a corner. The three of them walked out of Lester's office knowing what they had to do before the heist. Suddenly, someone called Michael's phone.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Love Has Consequences

"Hey... Ugh... Dad. I kinda... did something wrong and I need your help." It was Jimmy. Before Michael could reply, Franklin snatched the phone out of Michael's hand. "Yo J-Jizzle! Wat da fuk is wrong with yo racist white ass." Franklin Fuklie'd. "Hey F- my dawg!" Jimmy began in his attempt to sound gangsta. "I popped sum shit up an' I..." Jimmy stopped trying to black up his voice. "Look. I need help. Come to my Dad's house. Please. It's important." Jimmy finished. Franklin hung up the phone. "FUK. I JUS JIZZ IN MY PANTS WEN I THINK ABUT TAT KID." and with that Franklin pulled out some 5GUM and chewed it. He turned his head to the camera. "DAMN THATS WHAT I CALL GUD IN DA HOOD!" And then he stopped being a Facebook whore and looked at Michael. But Michael was not where he was supposed to be- he was busy with Trevor taking turns licking each other's arms. "That's some good shit T." Michael smiled taking another lick at Trevor's tattoo. "Yo! Pay da fuck attention and get y'all niggas listenin'! Your boy- Jizzle-" Franklin couldn't contain his not-so-secret lust for the boy and let out another cream sandwich. Trevor slid under Frankin's legs and scooped it into his mouth. "VANILLA! It's my mom's favorite flavor!" Trevor licked his lips finishing. "Anyway," Franklin started up, "He needs a favor. Says we need to help him with a problem. What do you guys think? We will have to postpone the Heist if you say yes." What will Michael choose?! 


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter Sex

Michael picked up his phone. Then he smashed it on the ground. "Nigga yo azz a baaaad mutha fuckin parent nigga." Franklin said to Michael as he looked at a sexy picture of Jimmy's blubbery bod in a speedo. "MICHAEL THAT'S MY NEPHEW AND I'M GONNA SAVE HIS ASS!" Trevor yelled in Michael's face. "HEY FUCK YOU I HATE YOU AND YOUR FUCKING PSYCHOTIC..." Michael was cut off as Trevor French kissed him. Franklin took out his iFruit 8 and took a picture. "Dayum dat's sexy." Franklin saved the photo. "Now are we gonna do this...as a family?" Trevor softly spoke while staring at Michael. "Sigh...fine...let's save Jimmy's ass." Michael gave in as usual. "JIMMY'S ASS? WHERE?!" Franklin looked around. Trevor and Michael stared at Franklin awkwardly. "You are a sick fuck." Trevor said to Franklin. Franklin shrugged and they all jumped into a random vehicle. Unfortunately, Franklin bounced off the vehicle instead of jumping into it because of errors. He ground into a bus and was run over by 50 bajillion cars. WASTED, The screen said. Michael and Trevor drove in the car in complete silence. "So...should we...wait for F?" Michael asked. Trevor turned his head. "Why don't you stop being a backstabbing bitch and stop avoiding that BRAD IS FUCKING DEAD?!" Trevor screamled. "Oh my god not this shit again." Michael took out his spare Hello Kitty oven mitts and rubbed them all over Trevor's face. Trevor cried instantly. "Yea, that's right. Keep calm and shut the fuck up." Michael crooned. Suddenly a Gas Machine Truck (TM) T-Boned the car Michael was driving and it flung Michael and Trevor out of the car. They skidded, leaving a blood trail. The driver of the Gas Machine Truck (TM) screamed at them, "WHY DON'T YOU FAGGOTS STOP SAYING MEMES AND GET A REAL JOB!" Then the driver drove away. Michael and Trevor got up slowly, to come face to face with a disgruntled and slightly terrified Jimmy. 


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter Sex-teen years old?

"Hey, Dad" Jimmy nervoused. "I'm glad you're here. Come inside." Jimmy got inside a random car. "cum inside..." A voice off in the distance was heard. "Must be an echo." Trevor off spaced. They got into Jimmy's car and they drove to Michael's house not saying anything. Then they went inside, following Jimmy. Jimmy sat on the couch grabbed a coke and turned on the tv. "Well?" Michael expect at Jimmy. Jimmy blank stare at Michael. "What is the problem!" Michael almost yelled. "Oh. I forgot- no I didn't. I just wanted to avoid it." Jimmy wheedled. "Okay. Can I just show Trevor?" Michael gawked and turned around. "Go ahead." Jimmy whimpered back to Michael, "no... Like leave the room... Dad..." And so Michael left. "So, Kid. What's wrong?" Trevor questioned. Jimmy moved over and motioned him to the kitchen pantry. He opened the door and revealed a pizza. "Ah. A pizza kid? That's what you are worried about?" Trevor laughed. But then he looked closer after seeing Jimmy's concerned facial expression. "Well kid... It looks fresh, baked well, cooked cleanly, fucked nicely, maybe a little too much pepperoni." Trevor awkwardly stared, not knowing what else to say or how to find what was wrong. "Trevor, I fucked the pizza." MICHAEL EXPLODED THE DOOR DOWN WEARING A JUGGERNAUT SUIT AND A NUKE STRAPPED TO HIS CHEST. "YOU MUSTARD FUCKING MOTHER I BUGHT THAT Prizza FOR YOUR BIETHDAY!111!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!11!1!1!" SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECHED MICHAEL. Michael was about to blow the switch of the Nuke when Franklin burst through the hole in the wall Michael had created two seconds ago. "CUM INSIDE? DID YO BOY Ji-" Franklin jizzed a little in his pants again, leaking from his leg onto the floor. "Zzle say that?!" Franklin was extremely excited, Jimmy was scared shitless, Trevor confused as fuck, and Michael in rage suicide nuke mode. "WE NEED THAT NUKE FOR OUR HEIST!" Screamed Lester on Michael's phone that turned to speaker for speech impediment disabled things like Lester. 


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: masturbate  
Everyone was going apeshit. Suddenly Fabien (that faggot yoga instructor) walked downstairs and posed in the faggoty yoga position that yoga instructors position in. "Calm down everyone. Let's all calm down." Fabien faggoted. "FUCK YOU MY SON JUST FUCKED A PIZZA! I'M GONNA BE IN THERAPY FOR YEARS!" Michael raged as he stepped closer to Jimmy. "Uh...actually Dad... I fucked it more than once.." Jimmy cringed. "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Michael was about to blow the nuke when Fabien stepped in the way. "Now now Michael, it's time to calm down." Fabien buddhad. "GRRRRR!" Michael didn't want to listen. Amanda came from downstairs too. "Michael, listen to Fabien! Do it for me!" Amanda bitched bitchly. "Ugh...fine..." Michael pouted and pussied out again. Amanda went back upstairs. "Ah, ok, since we're all grown men here, let's all have a nice, relaxing yoga session." Fabien prompted everyone to get in a circle. "Now, everyone, spread your ass cheeks and bend over. Yes, like that." Fabien was pleased as everyone did this. "Release the tensions of your anuses." Fabien commanded. Jimmy pooped a little in his pants because he's a fat shit with no muscle control. "Now, everyone, unzip your pants." Fabien said. Everyone obeyed. Fabien went to the middle of the circle and laid down on the floor. "NOW RAIN YOUR JUICES ALL OVER ME!" Fabien commanded. So then everyone circle jerked their Ds all over Fabien. "Ah man, this is better than that pizza!" Jimmy laughed as he smoked his bong while whacking it. "MM MMMM GOOD NIGGA." Franklin orjizzmed while staring at Jimmeh. Trevor broke something while jacking it because it wouldn't be violent enough without smashing a prized valuable. When they were done, Fabien looked like Frosty the Snowman. "Mamusamumumau." Fabien bowed and left the house. "I feel..better." Michael smiled, while unhinging the nuke. "Great...now we can get back to heist..." Trevor was cut off as Michael's phone rang again. This time it was Tracey, and he could hear that queer Lazlow in the background. 


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Meanwhile With Tracey

Tracey called Michael. "Daddy! I am applying for FameorShame again with that faggot Lazlow. Just so you know and if anything happens you know I'll be at the strip club! Love you bye!" She hung up. She turned to Lazlow. "So I need you to tell me my chances of getting a shot." And so Tracey began beat boxing and foisting herself. "BBSH BHHH BAHH SBHH SBHHS SBSSBSHHH BSHH BUH!" It was awful. Lazlow wanted to be nice but could not. "You FUKIN sucked." Right as Lazlow said this Michael appeared and ran dat smug ass over. "DONT YOU TALK TO MY LITTLE GIRL LIKE THAT." Trevor threw a chair to Michael and Michael began bashing the fallen Lazlow's head in with the chair. "DIE. YOU LITTLE. JUDGE FUK." Lazlow was dead."DADDY WHAT TEH HELL." Tracey scremed. "now I will have to become a necrophiliac!" And she did. She fucked body. Trevor filmed and Franklin gagged and Michael did not pay attention he was on phone with Lester. "Ok what next?" Michael asked. "You need to get the two vans. Everything else is taken care of by my laundry slaves." Lester snickered eating a snickers on the other line. "ARE YOU EATING A FUCKING SNICKERS?!" Michael roared, hearing that familiar delicious crunch that no one can beat. BUY SNICKERS BY SNOCKERS. "YOU FUKIN IDOT U HAVE DIABETES!" But Lester did not reply! Michael hung up and turned to Trevor and Franklin. "We need to go, Lester is in trouble." Michael warned. "In paradise?" Trevor trolled. Franklin just nodded. As they got into Michael's car Michael turned around and looked at Tracey, "hey talk to you later, have fun! Love ya!" And they drove off to help Lester!


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: The Heist Part 1

Michael sped through seven buses and one hundred people only to smash right through Lester's house. Lester was having a DIABEETUS attack on the ground! "SHIT!" Trevor yelled while jumping out of Michael's car and repeatedly jumped on Lester's disabled jelly gut. "Trevor wut da hell does u tink you doing nigga?" Franklin niggaed. "I'm saving him, duh." Trevor continued jumping on Lester like a trampoline. Michael rocket blasted Trevor off Lester. "I FUKIN HATE YOU YOU...YOU CANADIAN!" Michael roared. Trevor pulled a plunger out of his ass and stuck it on Michael's face. "AT LEAST I'M NOT A PUSSY ASS BITCH!" Trevor snarled like Pink Panther. "Oh hell no, I'm about to have a bitch fit!" Michael exclammered. Trevor and Michael began slapping each other like high school cheerleaders while Lester was still DIABEETUSing on the ground. Franklin shook his head and shoved insulin into Lester with his handy dandy meth needle. Lester got up. "Oh thank you, Franklin...by the way, what did you use to inject insulin into me?" "Mah needle, mah nigga." "OH NO YOU'RE AN AFRICAN AMERICAN THAT MEANS I GOT AIDS JUST NOW!" Lester hyperventilated and instantly died. "Man, fuck you." Franklin disapproved of Lester's racist death scene. Franklin picked up the plans to the heist from Lester's overweight bod and walked over to Trevor and Michael who were still at it. Franklin conked both of them on the heads with his Super Extreme Bong Blaster Deluxe Edition (TM). "EY! TREVOR, YOU A CRAZY ASS CANADIAN NIGGA, AND MICHAEL, YOU A LAZY PUSSY ASS BITCH. AND I'M A WHITE ASS NIGGA, BUT CAN'T WE ALL ACCEPT OURSELVES FOR WHO WE IZ AND GET THIS HEIST..." Franklin's Martin Luther King speech was interrupted by both Michael and Trevor exclaiming, "WOW! Is that a Super Extreme Bong Blaster Deluxe Edition (TM)?!" "'Ey? You all niggas even listenin to me?" Franklin was ignored as Michael and Trevor took Franklin's bong and blazed it on Lester's dead body. "Eh, what da fuck." Franklin shrugged and they all got high as motherfuckers...When they awoke, Franklin was wearing a Build-A-Bong costume, Michael was wearing pajamas made of ham steak, and Trevor looked like a minimum wage prostitute who might have sucked too many dicks last night. "Wh...where?" Michael began. "Are we?" Franklin finished. "Gentlemen, I believe we have made it in to the World Bank of Extreme Money." Trevor pointed upward to a sign that said exactly that. They were surrounded by gold; piles and piles of gold. "Yes...YESS! YESSSSSSS!" Michael pranced about and humped a little piece of gold, much to Franklin's chagrin. "Hold off Mikey, I hear some guards up ahead." Trevor cautioned. "Welp, better do what we do best." Michael shrugged, took out his phone, and ordered a blimp. "Hm. This door is open, I wonder why." A guard asked while peeking around the corner. "SHHHHH!" Franklin beckoned for the three of them to hide in a pile of gold. Unfortunately, Michael's phone was extremely loud. "THANK YOU FOR ORDERING A BLIMP WITH OUR BLIMP SERVICES (TM). PLEASE PICK UP YOUR BLIMP AT THE PRECISE LOCATION LOCATED ON YOUR PHONE RADAR." The woman SCREEEEEECCCCHEEEEDD so fucking loud. Trevor and Franklin cricked their necks and angrily bested Michael with their Neanderthal stares. "INTRUDERS! SOUND THE ALARM!" The guard yelled. "YA DONE FUCKED UP MIKEY." Trevor pounded on Michael's skull which concaved and caused Michael to have an aneurism. He immediately snapped out of it. "F, T, we got ourselves into this mess, and we're gonna leave with this gold!" Michael coached. "Actually, I don't remember shit." Trevor said while throwing up. "COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!" yelled a SWAT team armed to the vagina with bombtacular weaponry.


	12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11 : The Heist Part En

It was not a shady bathroom that the SWAT member was sitting in. No, it was rather the truck of a truck he had been in. He was a newbie, a fresh batch of pineapple just waiting to be scraped up and then shredded into pieces. He did not want to die like the others. There were armed criminals in the building for christ's sake! He quivered and waited to here the gunshots- but none ever game. He waited and waited and waited in a gentlemanly mannor(TM). Still no shots came. And when he finally mustered up some courage to look around the corner of the truck to see what monsters and beasts besiege him, a shocking turn of events occurred. He limped his head over- maybe two thirds of the way when BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM! Eight shotgun blasts simultaneously blasted the poor scumbucket that was newbie Tobethan Lt. Siere. It ripped the poor fellows head right off his shoulders, taking the spinal cord with it! "Hahaha" the eight SWAT members that blasted the poor coward chuckled at the dead faggot that was the new guy. "Serves him right" a leader carrying the dead body of Trevor snickered at the dead new guy. "All right, help me load these bodies, we are dumping them off at the NON-RESPAWN zone." And so, the rest of the SWAT helped haul the dead bodies of Franklin, Michael, and Trevor into the truck. They were dropped off in the NON-RESPAWN zone and have been stuck there ever since. The only way they can get out is if ROCKSTAR MAKES A PC VERSION OF GTA V Y WONT YOU DO IT ROCKSTAR MAKE THE PC VERSIN PLZ OR IL KIL MY MUM. K THX BAI JK ABUT KILLIN MOM. THX :3


End file.
